Most men aren’t skilful or thriving when it comes to meeting and dating women. There are two main reasons for this: they don’t get out there and sell themselves, meet women and make connections. And when, once in every blue moon, they do try it on with a girl, they fall flat on their faces, not knowing how to handle the circumstances, the conversation, the interaction and attraction. There’s a single word that ties these two reasons for failure together, its rejection.
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Men who would love to meet and date a beautiful girl or two choose not to go out and actually try to make it happen, on the most part, because of a deep-seated horror of rejection. They hate the idea that they might get shot down and embarrassed. And they know that if they try their hardest and STILL get rejected, they definitely have no hope with women, now or ever. So, they prefer to stay at home with the hazy ambition that one day they might make something happen. On the other hand, there are men out there that do try to meet and get together with girls – and, unfortunately, they get discarded every now and then. It’s happened a few of times; those brush-offs take their toll on the guy: his confidence dwindles, his sense of humor begins to fade, and most noticeably, his enthusiasm vanishes. He becomes like 80% of the rest of the male population: a dreamer and not a do’er.
The first thing you need to do is distinguish the POSITIVE function rejection serves. You need to classify it in your mind. What is it and what does it mean? Rejection often comes in the following forms:
1. You’ve been talking to a girl for a while and things seem to be going well but when you ask to see her again or suggest exchanging numbers she suddenly freezes up on you and shuts you out.
2. You try to get talking to a girl but she only gives you the minimal amount of recognition possible and doesn’t allow you to start a real conversation.
3. You’ve been on a couple of dates with a girl but have yet to take it further. When you try to progress the rapport, she clams up and becomes remote and seemingly uninterested.
Whatever type of rejection you’ve experience or fear the most, you need to fully identify what it is. It’s a sign that one or more components of your game – that is, your ability to be successful with women – isn’t carrying out correctly. It’s like a flashing red light in a submarine, it’s telling you something isn’t right and, most importantly, that you need to DO something to fix it. That’s the key point most men consistently miss – they think being rejected is the end of the line, game over. In fact, it’s simply an altering of the tracks on your path to success. Consider the following important points whenever you feel rejection negatively controlling your ability to do well with the women:
1. If a girl rejects your advances when you introduce yourself or try to start a conversation, it means she has decided that, for whatever reason, you aren’t someone she wants to get to know. However, remember this totally critical fact: she’s made her decision based on how you presented yourself in the short amount of time she knew/knows you. Rethinking how you act, speak and behave can produce a reply that falls at the complete opposite end of the scale from rejection and failure: one of success and triumph. Don’t let a single brush-off impact your motivation or confidence, simply see it as a sign that you need to alter and rethink your strategy.
2. Never take things personally when you’re playing the seduction game. Although a girl might not be attracted to you, it doesn’t mean she’s necessarily right to feel that way or correct in the assumption she’s made of you. People make impulsive decisions and have knee-jerk reactions to people, places and situations every day, in the positive AND negative. Your goal is to make a good first impression and display a strong sense of confidence and relaxation. Once you do that, your bad luck seems to magically disappear and a new long-term streak of good fortune begins. (Which is actually thanks to the fact that you didn’t let rejection get you down and instead used it as a sign that you needed to change something?)
If you can remember the concepts above and use them when ‘out in the field’, you’ll notice an almost hypnotic effect most men out there would kill to have themselves. Because, you see, it’s when you yourself can brush-off the brush-offs that real achievement happens and also what leads to you meeting and getting to know the girl of your dreams.
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